Courtship... A lost art

 

Courtship... A lost art

There has been a huge change of beliefs and behaviors in the past 20 years. From great innovations such as the smart phone, the self driving car, and hundreds of other innovations that have changed the way we live our day to day lives. This great flood of inventions have made life easier and more convenient in several ways, making transactions, communications, and ideas possible easy to take place around the world. This has helped the world in many ways but there have also been complications as humans have changed the way they think, behave, communicate, and... you guessed it, date! 

Dating started in 1896... or at least the first use of the word in the english language, was used in this date. Dating, or some form dating has probably been around since the beginning of mankind; after all people had to get married somehow! Of course there are also some other ways that people have gotten married throughout the ages, such as arranged marriages! But dating has been the most common modern day practice to finding a potential mate and partner. 

With Dating being so important, it makes sense that we have a need to do it right! After all the consequences of choosing a wrong life partner definitely has serious implications! While divorce and separation have become more popular in these last years, both actions take tolls on the emotions of all those involved, especially the children. And so, as we consider dating, we must also consider the consequences, both good and bad. 

Dating patterns and habits create a foreshadow of how the relationship will be after marriage. This is important on many level and is good to know so that we can pay special attention to these habits as dating continues. There are three important aspects in dating-

• Planned 
• Paid for 
• Paired off 

As well as three important responsibilities that men have as stated in THE FAMILY: A PROCLAMATION TO THE WORLD.

• Preside 
• Provide 
• Protect

And as we study these two different aspects of a man's responsibility we can see a great correlation.

Planned---Preside

Paid for---Provide

Paired off---Protect   

We can see the correlations as we dive a little deeper. As the man in the relationship prepares and planes a date, it shows responsibility on his part, as well as giving him the opportunity to preside and take charge of the date which he planned and prepared for. 

While it is 100% ok for the girl to pay, it is generally the responsibility of the man to pay for the dates. Which is great because it is truly practice for the men to prepare to one day pay for and provide for the family, his family. 

And as we pair off, we learn how to have feel real responsibility for the girl who we are taking on the date. This is also important because as we learn how to take care of someone. While on the date, we have the responsibility to take care of the person who we asked on the date. If anything were to happen to the girl, we would feel responsible.

Sliding vs. Deciding

We as members of the Church know that we need to date, and we also need to know that we are dating. If we don't do this, we cannot progress in our relationships, and if we do, then it can be dangerous. This is where Sliding or Deciding comes into play. We need to actively to decide what we are going to do, that is being an agent. I am bad at this and am improving, but I need to choose how we date and how we progress through dating. There are so many who never enter into "Courtship because they do not want to actively make a commitment. They don't want to sacrifice anything, because it would really take sacrifice and effort to build and better a great relationship. So most slide into relationships consciously or unconsciously trying to avoid that sacrifice, hoping the significant other in the relationship will be everything they are hoping for so that they can commit to that person. 

So keep this in mind if you have fears of courtship! It can be scary but God will help!